I woke up from a dream with two story-lines that criss-crossed and threw me about from one to the other.
One is about a pregnant woman who was not really pregnant but who was actually a sorceress of some kind. She had a perfect husband who seemed to be enthralled by her. She was also supposed to be someone I did not get along with, since she often bullied me in small subtle ways, and often used her unsuspecting husband to do it. But one day she was suddenly friendly, and then imploring, almost begging me to help her. There was something wrong with her baby, she said. She needed me, she said. Then I found myself, her, and her husband (who at this point looked a bit like Song Seung-heon) in my old bedroom in the apartment where I grew up. She was lying on my bed, in great discomfort, yet at the same time she had shed all pretence at being a normal person and was re-arranging the room by magic -- strange artefacts appeared on the walls, my old things transformed into her things. She also bossed her husband about, who seemed to be beginning to resist her enchantment. While he still obeyed her when she was looking, he undid her orders when she was not. He had also begun to ask me about what had been happening for he could not remember much before the enchantment weakened. I told him I didn't really know, for she was cruel to me and I avoided her as much as I could, and that he had been hers for quite a while (and I refrained from saying that it was such a disappointment). Then the woman began to cry out from inside the room and we rushed in to find her stomach wide open, and instead of a baby there were small bundles of objects wrapped up in either cloth or paper and tied up with ribbons. She was trying to find something and was in despair that she could not. The objects were the spells she had cast to get her way with anything but it seemed they were not enough. She wailed, no longer concerned that we had found out what she was and what a lie she had been. The husband, meanwhile, looked for the spell that bound him to her. He unknotted the ribbons and unwrapped the spell and then he was free. The witch was beyond caring. She wasn't dying, she was simply in pain for that which she could not find. I stood there, watching her, uncertain what to do, thinking how the room could not possibly still be habitable after this, and partly wondering if the husband was now truly free and if he would remember me.
The other story is myself back in high school, except it was a distorted fantastical version of my real high school. The school was on stilts and built near the ocean. I was there as myself now, but I was also in my younger body, which meant I was at my most awkward, insecure, and unattractive. My only saving grace was my mind which then carried the experience of many years. I found myself in a history class, taught by a terror of a teacher notorious for her verbal humiliations, odd whims, and playing favourites. There was a graded recitation. She started with the first seat out front and was going with the recitation one by one. I was on the last seat at the very last row. I tried to listen to the questions and answers, hoping to get a clue on what I was supposed to know. To my utter dismay, the history she was teaching had nothing to do with history as I knew it. She was teaching some kind of alternative and obscure history of which I knew nothing about. She was speaking of names, places, and events that were unrecognisable, not to mention impossible. There was an aspect of the supernatural in her version of truths. Many of my classmates were unable to answer her correctly, and for that she scolded them loudly with the utmost denigration and insults. The girl sitting in front of me was panicking, asking me if I knew any of the answers. I told her I did not, and it irritated me that my years of experience and gained wisdom would not count here. Meanwhile, one classmate did not seem to be bothered by all this, and was sitting back on his chair on the opposite end of my row. He was a favourite, and he was exempted from the graded recitation. He looked sometimes like Tomohisa Yamashita, and sometimes like Lee Min-ho. He was not even paying attention to the class, and would occasionally step out of the classroom without asking for permission. Then my turn came, and I was asked a question about a school in the mountains. The question was something like, "What is the true name of that school?" And I said I didn't know, and braced myself for the scolding, and was also ready to answer back. But instead the teacher said, "Since you are a new transfer you are excused. But please study next time. You have to catch up or you'll get left behind. I suggest extra library hours, even on holidays." Then I was in the library, alone, in the evening, and it was beginning to feel like the beginning of a horror story so I went to the door. Then I was by the ocean, and the beach was so vast. The sky was grey and cloudy. It was not a tropical beach. Then I was in the classroom again and I could feel the teacher was starting to lose patience with me because I was not learning fast enough. I thought, wait a minute, I don't have to be here. I don't have to sit through this. So I stood up in the middle of a class project and I walked out. As soon as I stepped out of the room it was the beach, and I looked back, and that classmate who was a favourite was following me. I let him approach and he said, "I wondered how long it would take you to figure it out." And then he took my hand.
I actually have a bit of a headache, and I am feeling peculiarly tired from my sleep. I have often remembered my night dreams, and they have often flowed with a strange coherence that allowed me to record them in writing. Most of the time I get lazy and just forget them within the course of a morning. But I think I should really use them as practice for storytelling. They are also rich in creative seeds -- I have the first few chapters of a novel tucked in somewhere that came from one dream, something about a scientist who secretly transforms into a fox, and who was also secretly a lord and prince of a hidden country.
I am going to have to put in some dayjob work hours today. I have a report to finish that is due for submission by next week. I hate to cram so I have spaced the hours and periods of work across the week in the least painful way. The remaining hours of my day I will pour into reading, writing, and some experimental painting. Tomorrow is a holiday but I will still need to work, just to be on the safe side of the deadlines.
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I am an artist-in-progress. I started my creative journey in 2012 and have never stopped taking steps since. Always one step at a time. Always moving forward. It has been an increasingly tough and occasionally rewarding road.
Models & Mentors
Emily W. Martin
That Curious Love of Green
The Dainty Squid
The School Of Life
Crafty Fun Kids by Sinead
David Beaver Art
Head Graffiti Studio
News From The Hill
Pretty Odd Peach
The Fiery Redhead
Upward Facing Blog
View From Zany Mountain
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